Tag: chronic illness

  • As terrible lotteries go

    I consider myself a healthy person. I’ve always had a regular exercise routine that at various times included running, swimming, pilates and weight training. I drink lots of water. I’ve never smoked, I don’t eat bacon, and I rarely drank excessively. I don’t have a car, so my daily step average was 18,000 steps. Aside […]

  • Greetings from the nursing home

    Ever since visiting my great grandmother in a nursing home when I was a kid, I’ve dreaded the physical decline, mental deterioration and lack of mobility that are, for most people, part of old age. Occasionally I’d imagine myself as elderly, and start to panic. To calm down, I’d have to remind myself that people […]

  • My neighbourhood is a poem

    Lately I’ve been collecting the names of houses in my neighbourhood. Where I grew up, houses didn’t have names. They were just houses. Everything else had names, including apartment buildings, but not houses, and that didn’t seem strange. When I moved to Australia, I was surprised by how many houses had names, and announced those […]

  • A certified medical ice cream float

    Update: I haven’t managed to get Pretzel and Popcorn, my wood-chewing, hay-eating, mould-sprouting chinchillas – yet. In the meantime, I’ve had to find something else to reduce the tedium of the enforced breaks I’m supposed to be taking five times a day, according to the chronic fatigue specialists. Which led me to purchase this Certified […]

  • Heal yourself with chinchillas

    Lately I’ve been spending a lot of time watching teenage girls on YouTube lecture me about chinchilla ownership, and I have a learned a lot. I’ve learned chinchillas eat hay, specifically Timothy hay, as though they are tiny misshapen horses. I’ve learned chinchilla well-being requires vertical play space. I’ve learned chinchillas need a supply of wooden […]

  • The new torture

    Developing post-infective fatigue syndrome, a condition that’s still largely a mystery to modern medicine, was a stroke of significantly bad luck. But I also had good luck, in that I had access to specialists at the nearby Fatigue Centre. The Fatigue Centre specialists explained that while there is no cure for post-infective fatigue, there’s a […]

  • Maybe you’re allergic to cockroaches

    When I first began to suspect that my intermittent, worsening bouts of illness might be the individual heads of one sinister, hydra-like illness, I came to a horrifying realisation: I’d have to see a doctor. It was May 2017. By then I could trace a clear pattern of symptoms back at least six months. But […]

  • The writing year in review

    In 2017, I became increasingly unwell and was eventually diagnosed with an untreatable chronic illness. This was not one of my new year’s resolutions. I’d created this space to post comedy snippets, but things don’t seem as funny when your body is a prison. I know, it’s not a great punchline. Still, looking back at […]

  • Spoons

    The problem with spoon theory is that I never know how many spoons I’ll have any given day. If I knew I had ten spoons, I could use them accordingly. But today I might have seven spoons and tomorrow only three, with no idea why. As though someone sneaks into my cutlery drawer at night […]